Except for the occasional sleepover, my kids are always home for the night. 6th grade, though, brings something called "Sixth Grade Outdoor Education", or 6th Grade Camp. Not something I experienced growing up in Northern California, it seems to have been the norm here in Southern California with most of my local friends telling me it was one of the most fun weeks of middle school.
My son left for his camp experience 3 years ago with a bundle of mixed emotions. He wanted to go, then he didn't want to go, then he wanted to go, etc. The day of camp arrived and he wasn't too happy to be going, but luckily it was only for 2 nights (budget issues had cut it from four to two). An empty spot sat in my heart for those two long nights, and I was fairly certain that he was homesick. And he was... his experience was anything but "fun" and he was extraordinarily happy to be home. He did however, talk about many of his activities and adventures for hours end, leading me to believe that it was not all bad.
Last week, Liv attended her own 6th grade camp and thankfully had a wholly different week doing what she does every day, she "Lived Life" at camp. Not only did she have no reservations about attending the camp and being away from home for the now 4 night/5 day camp, but she literally counted the days until she left. She has never been away from home for more than one night and while she did show a slight reservation about the length of time, she popped out of the car the morning of and was off in a flash.
Somehow seeing her leave so happy made it easier for me... for the first 3 days anyway. Then I really, really started to miss her. The house was far quieter, albeit cleanier, my schedule opened up without all the dance driving requirements, and we were all a bit more sedate... boring even. Life was simply different and all of us noticed an emptiness and our days weren't anywhere near as fun. Something was surely missing.
Liv had a wonderful week filled with night hikes, rock climbing, all day adventures and really, really bad food. Apparently the pancakes at breakfast were "edible", but the scrambled eggs (which tasted "powdery") were "disgusting". The only good part about the Sloppy Joes was the bread, and the pizza had no taste. Even the ice cream was "just ok". In essence, she said she lived on "edible pancakes, odd tasting chocolate milk, salad and bread" for most of the week.
Definitely needing to get some decent food into her we immediately got to making one of her favorite meals, pancakes. My mom-instincts kicked in and I felt a need to load the pancakes with healthy nutrients as we began filling the mixing bowls. Out of the pantry came whole wheat flour, wheat germ, flax meal, rolled oats and cinnamon all combined with a touch of brown sugar. Then we opened the fridge and pulled out fresh milk, eggs and buttermilk. Luckily we even had an over-ripe banana on the counter and we were set!
Hungry eyes watched eagerly as I mixed everything together and set the batter onto the griddle. All the while, my more grown up than ever girl chatted to me about her camp adventures, never once mentioning being homesick. As happy as I was that she had such a good time and that my girl is confident enough to go off on her own, I have to admit that my heart was just a touch sad that she didn't seem to have missed me at all.
Her eyes lit up as I placed a plate filled with freshly cooked pancakes in front of her and then filled her favorite little pitcher with syrup. She hungrily attacked the plate of food and actually groaned with pleasure at the flavors and tastes proclaiming this the "best meal in the world!". Going back for seconds, she finally began to relax and her eyes grew a bit heavy.
Turning to get started on the dishes I suddenly felt something behind me and then felt my heart begin to melt as my little girl's arms wrapped around my waist. She rested her head on my chest and said those words that I had been feeling myslef, "Mom, I love you so much... You can't believe how much I missed you." With tears in my eyes I admitted how lonely it had been without her and how much we had missed her too.
Living Life to the fullest is a good thing... but it's always nice to come home. All is now right in my universe.